black history, children, Hair, love, mercy

“WHAT DID YOU DO?!” (My daughter cut her hair!!!)

🌻Sometimes the result of a bad choice calls for an act of love and compassion.

That’s easier said than done!

• A few weeks ago I got a call from Bull, my husband, telling me that Raine’s grandmother attempted to take down her cornrows, that were by the way, waaaayyy overdue for some oils and moisturizer. I was told that as her grandmother began pulling her fingers through the 3 strand braids, a hunk of hair fell to the floor! (SAY WHAT?!) Raine would not tell anyone who had cut it and her dad was FURIOUS!

{Bull is all about protecting your crown(hair) and skin! When Raine was small, he would get so upset if she came home from daycare with a scratch on her face. He despised my random acts of cutting my hair and always told me that his daughters could never get their hair cut…as if he would be able to control that all of their lives}

•After talking to Raine over the phone for 10 LONG minutes, letting her know that mistakes happen and that she could tell mommy anything, she FINALLY told me that she cut her own hair. I wasn’t as upset as I thought I would be…granted, I had too cut my hair as a young girl trying to snip a rubber band to release my pony tail. I understood that she was a child and that these things would happen. I was disappointed, but y’all…BULL WAS LIVID! As an educator, football coach, & father of tender girls, I thought he would be more understanding to her late rebellious acts and child like experiments. He started talking to her like she was FIFTEEN YEARS OLD… at least that’s how I felt. I wanted to leave work and go hug on her. I felt so bad, even after her doing such a thing like that. Don’t get me wrong, his girls are his life & he’s wrapped around their fingers…he’s just all about discipline and obedience and we’d have you know, we’d told Raine OVER AND OVER again about not playing with scissors nor putting them ANYWHERE near her eyes and hair. So he was just upset and so mad that she didn’t adhere to our commands and had cut what later to be found, MULTIPLE chunks from her long dark brown, vibrant crown. Later, Bull did console her and I was so glad he did. No love like daddy’s! 

Luke 6:36 Be merciful, just as your father is merciful.

Wow! I’m so glad God is not like man! We can be so hard on one another. We lack showing mercy and grace the way God shows us OVER AND OVER again. This was a wake up call and I’ve got to do better.

“The Lord is gracious and full of compassion, slow to anger and great in mercy. The Lord is good to all, and His tender mercies are over all His works.” Psalm 145:8-9.

I have began praying for a calm temperament. That I be slow to anger and uneasily rattled. We sometimes allow the smallest things to have so much dominion over our peace. I have made a commitment to be more forgiving and more merciful to man. I’ve decided that I am in control of my peace and that I get to decide how circumstance affects me.

“To him who is afflicted, kindness should be shown by his friend, even though he forsakes the fear of the Almighty.” Job 6:14.

Raine was so scared that she would be punished about her hair. To her, her father is the almighty and my sweet girl was upset that she disappointed him. I could see it in her eyes. Sometimes we disobey or do things we know we shouldn’t, but we just don’t fathom the harm we are causing with our actions until it’s too late. I don’t believe she understood. Maybe perhaps she didn’t even care. I could tell though that she was disappointed in herself. She didn’t need judgment nor conviction, she needed kindness and love; mercy and grace. At the end of the day, IT’S JUST HAIR. It takes time, but it will grow back. For us, she was disobedient and that’s what ultimately caused the uproar… you know, like our parents telling us, “been there done that”, but we just HAVE to test the waters for ourselves.

I am not perfect and I mess up DAILY.

I’m just so thankful for God’s mercy! It has saved me so many times.

“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.” Matthew 5:7

For the record: Raine’s hair is manageable! We did not have to cut it to get it even. It just has to be styled strategically until it grows back. In leu of BLACK HISTORY MONTH, I’m thankful for Madam CJ Walker! Madam CJ Walker specialized hair products for African-American hair and was one of the first American women to become a self-made millionaire. Thank you dear! With your help, I’ve found some amazing products to help grow my daughter’s hair back beautifully and healthy…and honey I can lay down those edges.

I leave with each of you an undeniable peace and unwavering love!

🌻Thanks so much for reading!🌻

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3 thoughts on ““WHAT DID YOU DO?!” (My daughter cut her hair!!!)”

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